


Rey Appreciation Challenge

by saltylikecrait



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Mentions of Starvation, Nature, References to Depression, Story within a Story, The Force
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-11
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-05-20 04:36:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14887769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saltylikecrait/pseuds/saltylikecrait
Summary: A series of one-shots centering around Rey.





	1. A Choice

**Author's Note:**

> This is a series of one-shots that I set as a challenge for myself. 
> 
> Challenge Rules:
> 
>   * Must focus on Rey as an individual
>   * All fics must be 750 words or more
>   * Relationships can be a focus, but nothing romantic/sexual
> 


The suddenness of how the Force came into her life had been overwhelming. One moment, she was just an unextraordinary Jakku scavenger and the next she had taken on the title of the Galaxy’s Last Hope.

Rey thought the expectation of her single-handedly being the savior of the Resistance was a little too far-fetched to her liking. Unlike Luke Skywalker, Rey had no teacher to even show her the basics. Everything she has known so far came from old stories and from observing Kylo Ren. She blamed him for this. Had he not taken her from Takodana – of course, that would mean that he would have either killed her or taken BB-8 instead – she probably would not have awakened her Force abilities. She would have preferred to just be a mechanic or a pilot for the Resistance than to have all that weight put on her shoulders.

She also bitterly wondered how much easier life on Jakku would have been had she discovered her Force-sensitivity earlier on. Scavenging would have definitely been easier if she had floated large and heavy amount of material down to Niima Outpost with her mind. 

The pieces of the Skywalker lightsaber sat in her lap. Unlike Star Destroyers and X-wings, Rey had no idea how to fix it or make a new one. Some parts looked salvageable, but the crystal that sat in the center worried her the most. She didn’t know if it would ever work again and the stories she had heard about the Jedi and the Empire made her believe that new crystals might be scarce.

Why can’t the Force be done with me? she often asked herself. In the snowy forest of Starkiller, the dark side tempted her to kill her enemy, but the light told her otherwise. The Force was not done with Kylo Ren yet and it hinted that it was just getting started with Rey.

But the Force did not provide her with what she needed. No wise master appeared to teach her. No prophecy gave her hints of what the outcome to all of this would be. No, instead, Rey found herself alone as the last Jedi, if she could even call herself that, with the only tools at her disposal being a broken old lightsaber and even older texts full of a language she did not understand.

She did not believe herself to be a chosen one, for surely everything would have played out differently. Legendary Luke Skywalker would have eventually come to his senses and trained her, instead of giving her a cold shoulder and offering bitter snippets of advice. She would not have had to appeal to Kylo Ren if this had happened, knowing already that her attempt to turn him back to the light was naive at best. Even then, she knew there was a slim chance of him returning, even if he struggled between the light and the darkness.

And if she failed, would this mean the end of the Jedi and the light? Luke had told her that the light would never fade if the Jedi died out, but Rey knew how easily it was to snuff out hope. She had no idea what Kylo Ren’s intentions were as Supreme Leader. It was obvious he killed Snoke mainly because he had become a threat to his life. When Han had told him that Snoke would dispose of Ren when he was done with him, Ren did not challenge this statement, rather, he seemed to understand this all too well.

If the First Order won, she imagined a world full of darkness and knew that she would not survive to see this world. The threat of another Starkiller would loom overhead forever. Most of the surviving Resistance members would be executed, possibly publicly. Finn would no doubt be sent to reconditioning, something he mentioned with a sliver of fear and she knew that the First Order would put him through that to humiliate him. They would not let a troublesome, traitorous former stormtrooper die, they would make sure he survived to be forced to do all the things he dreaded the most. Maybe, they would even force him to kill his own friends, the people that became his family.

If anything, Rey would do whatever she could to prevent that future from happening. She might not have wanted this title, but if it has fallen to her, she would take up that mantle and find a way to make the galaxy more livable. She couldn’t solve all the conflicts in the galaxy, but she could try to stop this one.

Maybe destiny was something she could choose for herself after all.


	2. Storytelling

There aren’t many travelers that return to Jakku time and again without having business on the junkyard world. If they weren’t looking for cheap parts or had dealings with Unkar Plutt, Rey had no idea why anyone would want to return.

Yet an old Togruta woman would reappear now and then, sometimes for parts for her shuttle, but usually for no particular reason except that she was in the region.

The woman, who wore almost all white and had an air of wisdom and ancient mystique about her, fascinated Rey. She was kind, too, especially to all the children that were unfortunate enough to be left on their own on Jakku. Sometimes, she would discreetly slip a candy into their bags for them to find later, and Rey would savor the taste of sweetness on her tongue for as long as she could. 

But the thing she loved the most about the woman’s stops in Niima was her storytelling. She always seemed to have something new to tell Rey, and she told each one like she had actually been there to experience them.

But one story, in particular, stayed on Rey’s mind for years and years after she heard it, even after the woman stopped showing up. She wondered if the Torgruta finally died, ancient as she was, or if she had tired of Jakku. Rey wouldn’t blame her.

At the age of eleven, it was one of the last stories that Rey had heard from the woman.

“There was a Jedi,” she began. “He was kind and brave, though at times very reckless. He was loved by his students even if he wasn’t the best teacher.”

Rey’s favorite stories were the ones about the Jedi and Clone War and Rebellion pilots. Rey was no Jedi, but maybe one day her parents would return for her and she could become a pilot, just like she had imagined in her daydreams and playtime.

The Togruta continued. "But like all beings, he was imperfect. He got attached to others too easily, even though it was forbidden by the Jedi. He loved. And he was afraid of losing the people he loved the most and became angry when he did.

"That anger and fear was his downfall. He loved a woman, an intelligent, graceful senator of Naboo. They married in secret and when she became pregnant, he dreamed that his children would take her away from him, that she would die as they were born. He was desperate to keep that dream from coming true."

"Did it?" Rey asked, wide-eyed and hoping for a happy ending.

The woman nodded. "It was his own doing. The dark side tempted the Jedi. An evil man tricked him into believing that the dark side would save her. He fell for it, and he killed his allies and betrayed his loved ones. The Jedi fell because he fell. His wife went to appease him, but he was far too gone. He hurt her, and his best friend fought him on the lava fields of Mustafar. It burned the Jedi to the bone."

Rey did not like this part of the story. She wanted happy endings. She wanted to know that the baby was born to two loving parents.

"The Jedi became more machine than man and the woman had her babies — a boy and a girl — but she died right after. Had he not sought the dark side, had he learned to let go, his dream might not have come true."

“What happened to him?” Rey asked. “And the babies?”

The woman got a faraway look in her eyes when Rey asked her this and she took a moment before she continued.

“The Jedi became one of the most feared beings in the entire galaxy. He killed hundreds — thousands — played a role in the death of millions; he terrorized the galaxy in the name of his dark master.

“But the babies survived and brought hope to the galaxy. They are real, just like you and me. One is Leia Organa, princess of the destroyed world of Alderaan, heroine of the Rebellion, and one of the founders of the New Republic. The other is Luke Skywalker, the last Jedi.”

At the mention of these names, Rey got excited. While she loved to hear stories about Leia Organa, it was Luke Skywalker who she pretended to be sometimes when she was scavenging. Using the Force would make her day’s work so much easier.

“In the end, the fallen Jedi returned to the light out of love for the son that he never knew and hate for the master that played a part in taking away everything he ever cared about. In his son’s eyes, he was forgiven, but his daughter and the galaxy… they could never find forgiveness in their hearts, nor should they.”

This was something that Rey did not understand. All stories should have happy endings, yet she knew already from years of living on Jakku that most beings did not get their happy ending.

“I don’t understand.” She shook her head.

The Togruta smiled and reached out to gently ruffle Rey’s hair. “I don’t expect you to,” she said. “You are quite young. But the lesson is that not everyone can be redeemed. There are some crimes that can never be forgiven and never be made up for.”

She slipped Rey a candy discreetly, making the child giggle silently while she hid it in her pocket for later.

“But enough sad stories for today, what do you have to show me?” She nodded at the old helmet that sat securely under Rey's arm.


	3. Survivors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for all the angst! Rey's character is just full of it!

She was very disappointed to find that Ahch-To was a green island but mainly voided of fauna.

Not that she could say she had a ton of experience with landscapes and biomes, but after visiting Takodana she thought an island surrounded by water would have trees and flowers springing up. So far, it has also rained about half the time she’s been on the island, too. She wondered if it had something to do with the salt in the water or the rough terrain. Ahch-To was so rocky that she wondered if the soil was the right kind for plants to live and grow in.

That didn’t explain the old Force tree, which had been there for centuries at least and was only now in the stages before death. She wished she could have seen it in its prime. Did it grow tall and strong with leaves or blossoms? Did the first Jedi gather around it more than just to protect their texts and anything else important that had been lost to time? 

But she found one plant that particularly caught her eye. To someone that had lived among flowers and greenery their entire life, the spherical, purple, and prickly plant would not have been of any real interest. It was not tall nor beautiful nor sweetly smelling. This was a plant, maybe even a weed – she still had yet to have someone point out a weed to her – that was hardy and a survivor. It lived in a harsh, wet, and even cold and windy environment and still thrived.

Like Rey, these plants did not look like much to the eye. No one expected much of a half-starved, sun-worn Jakku scavenger either. She had already shocked so many with her piloting skills and mechanics. Some had even questioned her literacy in Basic. With pride, Rey had taught herself all these skills with scavenged materials and old manuals and novels with additional careful observation. No one had taught her, though sometimes she felt brave enough to ask questions. Everything that Rey could do was because of herself. That was, of course, until the Force came along.

Now, she wondered how much of her was still Rey the scavenger and not what the Force had suddenly morphed her into. She had never felt the pull of the dark side, never had the additional sense of something that was just more than her physical being. Now she was a child of destiny, someone that others would look to as a source of hope and inspiration. It was a role she never thought she’d end up in and never wanted to begin with. Legends and stories were fun, but reality was far from that. Now she had a dangerous Force-user on her trail, hoping to lure her down the same path he had chosen, and he was willing to hurt her in any way possible to wear her down to get her to give in.

She would have been so lucky to be someone like Ben Solo. Han and Leia had obviously loved their son, and Luke had been heartbroken by his nephew’s betrayal. People like them did not deserve that pain, not after everything they had already been through. But even Rey knew that love did not create good people without fail just as a void of love did not create bad people. Rey had no one in her life and she would have never killed another without reason. She spared Kylo Ren’s life back in the forest because she sensed that the Force was not done with him yet.

But then, when would it be done with either of them?

Now, she was running out of options. She did not trust the man that appeared to her through the Force, yet so far, the only thing she thought to do was try to appeal to that small branch of light within him, struggling not to be consumed by the darkness. Luke Skywalker had been no help to her, and Rey could only feel disappointed with him, believing that he could be so much better than this. And she couldn’t go back to the Resistance empty-handed, not after they promised her that they would look after Finn who risked everything to get her off of Starkiller and take the weapon down in the process.

Right now, until she got back to the Resistance and Finn, she would have to live the way she did on Jakku and realize the only person she could rely on and trust was herself. She was a survivor and survive she must.

Maybe she could find beauty in that little plant. They had so much in common, after all.


	4. Crown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little fluff before we go back to our scheduled angst!

It had been a surprise to Rey when she entered her living quarters and found a box lying on her mattress. She was certain that not even BB-8 knew her door code, so who would leave something like this was a mystery to her. Because her duties to the Resistance differed from everyone else, she had been given the privilege to have her own private space. The greedy part of her was happy for this because she was not sure how much she would enjoy sharing space with others, being so use to living alone and guarding her space and the few belongings she had. Using the excuse that meditation and study required quiet and focus was acceptable to the quartermaster.

The box was white, decorated with a simple pink ribbon that wrapped around the outside and kept the contents from falling out. There was no note or tag to tell her who the box was from and so, ever so suspiciously, Rey tugged on the ribbon to release the knot and slowly removed the lid, peering inside.

She gasped when she saw what was in the box and gently removed a flower crown out, admiring it. The flowers were silk, delicate pink and white tea roses and small green leaves. Looking again in the box to see if she missed a note, she sighed when she found nothing to tell her who the gift was from.

A quick rearrangement of her hair was all that was needed to prep to place the crown on her dark brown hair. While she often went back to her favorite hair buns, Rey was trying new things. Today, the top portion of her hair had simply been pulled back to keep it from falling into her face as she worked. It was an easy style she had decided tried on Ahch-To and the crown sat nicely on her head.

With a little grin on her face, Rey removed the heavy old Jedi text out her bag and placed it on the nightstand next to her bed before going back out into the hallway. She met her friends for lunch in the mess as always, but this time, there would be something different to break the routine.

“Hey now; that looks nice,” Poe commented upon seeing Rey approach the table with her tray of food. Rey was excited to see that a sweet, pink fruit she could not recall the name of was being offered today – a local staple of Dantooine produce – so she took two intending to save one for tomorrow.

Rose looked the flowers over and nodded. “The colors look nice on you. You look good in pink.”

But Finn’s reaction was probably the best. When he arrived from training with infantry, he took one look at Rey’s hair, looked straight at her face and said, “Woah, Rey. You look really pretty.”

And if the other comments made Rey blush, this one made her go positively pink in the face.

“They’re silk, so they won’t die,” she explained. “I can wear them from time to time.”

“Where did you get them?” Rose asked.

Rey shrugged. “I went back into my room a few minutes ago and there was a box on my bed.”

And that made Rose’s eyes light up. “Ooooh, a gift? From who?”

Everyone was staring at her with curiosity now.

She shrugged again. “There was no name with the box.”

“Oh ho,” laughed Poe. “Rey’s got a secret admirer.”

She would have guessed that if anyone had given her the flower crown, it would have been one of these three, but their faces told her otherwise. None of them were the sender.

“Well, in any case,” Poe interrupted the train of thought, “we should take some photos of you. That would be cute.”

So the free part of their afternoon was spent outside on the plains of Dantooine. At first, everyone was helping Rey find poses for good photos, but eventually things turned silly. She placed the crown on Rose’s head first, then Poe’s. Poe was decidedly OK with the decoration and made the most dramatic poses possible for photos.

But Finn may have looked the best with the crown. He was growing out his hair and the crown just sat perfectly on his head.

When they returned to go to whatever activity they had until dinner, and Rey made a quick stop to her room to place the crown for safekeeping. She passed General Organa on the way there.

“Oh good.” She smiled. “You liked it.”

And Rey was shocked. “This is from you?”

Leia nodded. “Saw it on my last trip to the marketplace. I remember you said you’ve never gotten to wear pretty things before. It made me think of you.”

“T-thank you, Leia.”

The general waved her hand. “It was nothing, Rey. I wanted to get you that.” And then she continued on to wherever she was going.

That flower crown remained one of Rey’s most cherished possessions for the rest of her life.


	5. Cycles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for all the angst in these one-shots. Really, I am. I wrote these about a month back and was having a bad mental health week when I wrote this particular addition.
> 
> Warning: mentions of depression and starvation

The first time she heard a human argue that animals in the wild could not be depressed because they were too busy trying to survive, she wanted to laugh. Jakku had essentially turned her into a wild animal; the only laws of civilization she absolutely had to abide by was to work for her next meal. She fought off predators, those that would steal her latest find or would hurt her. She wandered the desert for scraps of metal. Playtime was only for after she secured food for the day and she certainly didn’t have to have manners or anything of the sort when she ate.

But no time to be depressed? There was plenty of time to be depressed when you had no one to talk to and no purpose but to survive.

There were days when she did not open her mouth once to speak. Days when she went to bed with a growling and pained stomach. Nights when she found sleep eluded her and in her loneliness for love and companionship she cried until she couldn’t any longer.

There were days when the galaxy seemed hopeless and never-ending. Days when she found herself believing that she would live her life forever in the cycle of work, maybe eat, sleep, repeat. Nights when she wished that she wouldn’t wake up in the morning; sure, she would never see her parents again, but at that point she wasn’t even sure if they were going to come back or even were still alive.

But still, she continued to believe that her family would return for her. That was her only source of comfort in a life so desperate and full of suffering.

Even Kylo Ren was quick to pick that part of her mind until she was left open and raw. When she resisted him, that sadness was what he wanted to use to wear her down until she gave in and gave up the map to Luke Skywalker.

And that continued well after she left Jakku and rejoined the Resistance. Crying at night was not uncommon, but now it was because she felt trapped in a cycle of pain and death. The nightmares did not stop and now they seemed to cut into her emotions more sharply and neatly, like a wire slicing into her skin. She dreamed that after she had left, her parents finally returned and found nothing of the daughter they had left behind. She dreamed of Kylo Ren torturing Finn and Poe Dameron, forcing her to watch them suffer as he killed them slowly. She dreamed that she dies by a lightsaber through her stomach, just as Han Solo died, leaving the galaxy to face the dark side and the First Order without her.

Those are the nights when she wakes up crying and unable to get back to sleep. She’s exhausted the next morning, but she’d rather face that than dream those nightmares again.

Some nights, she drags herself out of bed and into the bunks of one of her friends. Finn is always the first she thinks of, him never being one to turn her away. He’s also literally a very warm person, and Rey finds this physical comfort to be one of the best things she could ask for. Sometimes, she goes to one of the pilots of Black Squadron, usually Jessika Pava, who has become a fast friend since her return to the Resistance after Crait. Sometimes even Rose Tico, whom Rey is not one-hundred percent sure about but connects with her through loneliness and troubled sleep. Rose’s family is gone too, but at least she had gotten time to know them. There are times when Rose watches Finn and Rey with a cross between a curious glance and a glare. There is something going on between them but Finn will not tell her anything and Rose just grunts, “It’s nothing,” when Rey gathers the courage to ask.

It was easier to go through the cycles of sadness and hopelessness with others as long as she wasn’t bringing them down with her. This really worried Rey and she did not wish this trapped feeling onto anyone. When the looming threat of Kylo Ren shadowed over her, she tended to feel like isolating herself. It was not uncommon for her to hide herself away, specifying that she was focusing on the Force and did not wish to be bothered by anyone. She knew that Finn and Poe were starting to see through this, however.

There were services to help those who were feeling this level of despair, but Rey doubted that any of the doctors with their fancy degrees could even imagine what it felt like to be seen as a savior with a great destiny. That in itself was isolating. She told herself that when the war was over and the First Order was no more, she would try to attend sessions with one of these doctors but something told her that she wouldn’t feel so trapped when the threat of death and failure no longer was held over her head.

She couldn’t wait to see that world where she didn’t have to worry about any of this stuff anymore. Now Rey’s only job was to survive long enough to see it.


End file.
